B is for Beer, by Tom Robbins

Wednesday, July 20, 2011 § 12

"The ordinary world is only the foam on top of the real world,
the deeper world."

B is for Beer by Tom Robbins
Format: Hardcover, 125 pages

Harper Collins Publishers
With Film Version? None
Number of Times Read: One and a half times.

Once upon a time (right about now) there was a planet (how about this one?) whose inhabitants consumed thirty-six billion gallons of beer each year (it's a fact, you can Google it). Among those affected, each in his or her own way, by all the bubbles, burps, and foam, was a smart wide-eyed, adventurous kindergartner Gracie; her distracted mommy; her insensitive dad; her non-conformist uncle; and a magical butt-kicking intruder from a world within our world.

Populated by the aforementioned characters-- and as charming as it may be subversive-- B is for Beer involves readers, young and old, in a surprising, far-reaching investigation into the limits of reality, the transformative powers of children, and, of course, the ultimate meaning of a tall, cold brewski.

Stare at the cover, then read the title.

A children's book, or a grown-up's?  No way am I gonna buy a kiddie book! I'm so over and done with those for like two days ago! (x [Please bear with me and my humor.;)]

The title is kinda kindergartney-alphabet-song but the word BEER is obviously for me (and so is it for you, cus you're a grown-up too!). Suddenly I'm curious about the cheapest liquor that made me dizzy on party nights. I scanned through the pages and "..beer's made outta hops.." caught my eye. The first thing that came up on my mind is San Miguel Beer's advertisement of their product being made out of floral hops. I've been thinking, but never got around to Googling how beer is associated with flowers, because it makes me wonder, I mean, there's nothing flowery to its taste or scent. More like cat's piss to me, if you ask. I'm not much of a beer fan, I actually prefer it's stronger counterparts. I only drink it because it gets me in an inebriated state every time and anytime I desperately need to, at a cheaper price. Funny how we always associate expensive with quality, but we all know that's wrong. But when it comes to alcohol, most of the time, the more expensive it is, the tastier. And more intoxicating.

So I am curious about beer, the cheapest alcohol, the yellow beverage I slugged on party nights and made me feel hungover on morning-after's. So I actually bought the book. And I have to admit, I did sure want to read about the adventurous kindergartner Gracie and why she's been dragged into the world of beer and floral hops that are not the least bit flowery..

Of course, since I am actually featuring it on my blog, you can already guess that B is for Beer is so applesauce for a kiddie book! :D I finished reading it in just one sitting since it's got only 125 pages. It is beery enlightening (excuse the pun!), thanks to the beer fairy, who showed herself to Gracie to teach her something about the substance she's dealing with. That's when the beer lecture began and in a simplified manner, it is explained how beer came to be, who invented it, how it's made, where it comes from, and the things it does to the human body. The last bit, we both know already (don't deny! you drink beer too, am i righttt?) but it is fascinating to read about the funny and crazy and barbaric and the seemingly brave stuff humans do when inebriated.

So, is this a children's book, or a grown-up's? The author Tom Robbins said he intended it for children but he hoped that many adults would read it. Really, the cover and the illustrations found inside are actually quite enticing to the kiddies, but I don't think a kindergartner would ever want to read this stuff, or if she ever would, what the beer fairy has to say would be gibberish to her six year-old mind. But I really do hope older kids, and, yeah even adults, would get around to reading this. We all need to know about the beer fairy's lecture about this substance, because if you would look at the news, thousands of people get killed due to vehicular accidents and a vast percentage would account to DUI cases. And if there's a celebrity who should spend a few dollars for this kid-dult book, Paris Hilton would be it. Perhaps if she reads B is for Beer, she'll behave more responsibly. (x But I do like her. Really..(;

Whatever, bitch. I think it's a lame publicity stunt.

In case you're wondering about the hops, yes, they are indeed floral-- dried hop flower pellets actually-- and it's what makes beer taste bitter. Don't get it wrong by thinking that beer is made outta hops. Hops is just one of the many ingredients of beer. And just in case you're wondering whatever happened to Gracie, why don't you read the book?

Rating: 5 out of 5 beer kegs! ((;

Interesting Quotes:

"Mystery is the face everybody shared before they were born and the joke they'll finally get after they're dead."

"Never be afraid to love, not even when there's a chance you're not being loved in return."

"Courage is where you find it. Bravery that comes from a bottle-- or from  book or from a sermon-- lacks the full strength and purity of bravery that comes straight from the heart."

"It's personal freedom, not hundred dollar bills that lights the soul's cigar."

"We are seldom as limited as we think we are."

"You know what the game of golf is, don't you? It's basketball for people who can't jump and chess for people who can't think." --> funny lol 

"Beer can lead men to think they're mighty and foul-mouthed women to believe themselves amusing and hip."

"Beer's nice for being glad and dizzy, and sometimes for the mystery and stuff, but the happy that comes out of a beer can is not like the real happy you got to make in your heart."

"There's nothing like the word dangerous to generate interest: it's irresistible to young males, scary to most young females."

Found this on Google images. I totally dig it!

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§ 12 Response to “B is for Beer, by Tom Robbins”

  • looks interesting :O if i find it in a book store i'll sit in a corner and read it (won't buy it though, my bookshelf is reserved for thick grown-up novels only haha)
    loved the golf quote, it made me LOL! and the picture at the end too :D

  • Hmmm sounds interesting & i just might buy it & keep it to give my little when he's older! Thanks xoxo

  • That last image had me laughing! This was an interesting read. The hops, I had no idea about, too.

  • mayen says:

    hmm.. I am not a beer drinker, I prefer wine, brandy or baileys.. hehe.. interesting yung book ah? Sana makakita ako nyan. :)

  • krn says:

    Seriously, I don't drink beer. :D my acidic gut has given up. hehe. but i dunno why it doesnt give up on tequila and wine. whahaha BTW, interesting book! I probably had seen it in bookstore. Can't remember where.

  • iya_khin says:

    i'm not a fan of beer either kasi it makes me always weewee eh! tas i don't like d smell! i prepare brandy, gin or rum! oo na ako na ang sunog baga, but that was before!

    sa totoo lang i envy u,kasi ako dami ko pang dapat basahin na books kaso til now wala pa akong natatapos at nauumpisahan! last kong nabasa yung series ni suzanne collins..

  • sam says:

    naks naman..hehe..yang pic ni paris hilton oh!

  • MG says:

    kapag nagrerescue ako sa kalsada, madalas mga nakainom mga victim, minsan nakakadamay pa sila..hehehe.

    wala lang nashare ko lang... idol talga kita sa book review..minsan magbobook review ako, wag mo pagtawanan ha? hehe

  • monica says:

    waah! karen!!! ganda naman ng blog mo! nakita ko link mo sa fb!makagawa nga din hehe panu ba, paturo ah!hehe.. mahilig ka pa ding mgbasa-basa, pahiram na siren ng books mo!hehe..
    -monmon toh

  • Anonymous says:

    Haha...I love the Paris hilton pic. Man...is she a bitch or what? That too a dumb one. lol.

    I think I should read the book. I'm already in love with the cover :)

  • kayren says:

    thanks guys.. you really should read the book (;

  • Interesting to ah.
    Ako di ako umiinom. Kahit ano maliban sa tubig at Juice pero alak hindi talaga, Pero sige na nga TANDUAY ICE. ahahah